Author: UnitedHR

The Courage to do it Scared

Sometimes, we must go after our goals even when we are scared.

image to represent new year resolutions and planning to implement them, going after your goals even when scared

Weeks into the new year, Deepa felt miserable because she was not able to implement all the big and small New Year resolutions she had made.

Noticing her gloom, the people around her had tried to reassure her:

“It’s okay, it has only been a few weeks, you still have the time to implement your plans.”

“It’s okay, maybe you can start your plans during the Spring season, the actual new year in nature!”

“It’s okay, you can only begin with the small resolutions and then move on to the bigger ones.”

“Yes, take it slow, one day at a time, one resolution at a time…”

Slow, she had taken it, and she had the necessary planning, all done. The only thing to be done was the implementation, and yet something was stopping her.

Varsha, a wise old friend who was also like a mentor had been noticing Deepa’s dejection at her own inability to implement things. Varsha and Deepa lived in the same building, and would often carpool together- their offices were quite nearby and they would often spend their lunch-time together whenever possible.

During one such lunches, they both got into a conversation around Deepa’s new year resolutions. From wanting to eat healthier, to starting her own Youtube channel, Deepa had everything planned out. The planning and the resolutions themselves were quite realistic, so there was really nothing that could prevent Deepa. And as had been mentioned earlier, something was stopping her.

‘I don’t know what is happening Varsha ji. I wake up everyday and look at my post-it notes, my step-by-step planning. But I get scared.’

‘Scared of what dear Deepa?’ Varsha inquired with a gentle expression. She indeed had much love, like an older sister, for Deepa.

‘I am scared of so many big and small things. I am scared, for example, my Youtube channel will not work. Or it might work too well and I will be overwhelmed by it all. I am scared that my resolution to wake up early and get into fitness will result in detection of some new health problem that might prevent me from fulfilling my resolution. And for some resolutions, I am just plain scared that I might fail. Every day I wake up with the hope that today these fears will go away and I will be able to start implementing my resolutions. But the fears don’t seem to be going away.’

‘That’s a lot to be scared of!’ Varsha let out a small chuckle but quickly her expression changed into something Deepa was sort of familiar with; the ‘boss-lady’ expression who got things done and who helped get her employees to new heights. With a firm, resolute expression but with ever more warmth, Varsha said,

‘Deepa, the fears may never go away. You may never stop getting scared. Sometimes, even I get scared. I have my fears too.’

‘Really? Then what do you do when you get scared? How do you make the fear go away?’

Varsha took a deep breath and continued, ‘The fears never go away. Or they go away for some moments and then they come back. They key is to go ahead despite the fears.’

Deepa thought about it for a bit and asked, ‘But what if it’s my instinct that’s preventing something bad happening? A woman’s gut feeling is said to be very strong…’

‘Agreed. But gut feeling will not leave you questioning and anxious; gut feeling doesn’t paralyze you- it leaves you feeling stronger and firmer with your decision to do or not do something. Fear on the other hand leaves you feeling miserable; you feel like a failure and you begin questioning your own capabilities. You seem to be in fear, don’t you think?’

Deepa nodded.

Varsha continued, ‘Yes. Fears are going to be there. Yet you must get up and chase your dreams, big or small. You must not, cannot, wait for fears to subside. I still do some things where my heart beats faster than usual, where I get worried about what lies next, where all sorts of possibilities form in my head. And yet, I go for it. I have planned things. I have prepared. I have done what is expected of me to do- my ‘karma’. Ideally, I shouldn’t be scared but if I am, then so be it. I do what I want and need to do, even if I am scared.’

And with this, Deepa found new courage to go ahead and start with ticking off one new year resolution at a time, with her impeccable planning. For some of those, she was scared. But she went ahead, anyway, scared.

Team UHR wishes everyone a very happy new year. May the year bless us with courage to implement our plans, and face our fears with the courage to go for what we want, even if it is scary. There is courage in doing it scared.

Tools that Actually Matter

In a time when external excess and internal emptiness co-exist, a reminder about the ‘tools’ that matter.

image to show the importance of skill vs fancy tools

Sam had called a plumber for a leaking pipe in his kitchen. Soon, a middle-aged man with a faded tool-kit walked in, calmly but purposefully.

As he started working, Sam noticed certain things that made him question this man’s qualifications as a plumber. A wrench with a cracked handle. A saw that had half its part missing. But Sam also noticed something else that left him puzzled- despite these broken tools, the plumber appeared unbothered. In fact, he was doing the work with his characteristic calm and, rather skilfully.

Ten minutes ago, Sam was almost convinced that he had called the wrong man for the job, but soon enough, Sam had to also change his mind. Although he remained puzzled.

The plumber had identified the issue correctly, worked with these seemingly broken tools. The leak was gone and the tap looked as good as new. Impressed and grateful, Sam decided to give the plumber extra money.

The plumber shook his head and refused, further adding to Sam’s puzzlement. ‘Who refuses extra money in this day and age?’

The plumber responded, ‘Every job has a fixed worth. If I take extra money today, I will expect the same or even more tomorrow. When that doesn’t come, I will be disappointed. I prefer to be content with what I have.’

Now Sam’s puzzlement was mixed with admiration and pity. ‘At least buy yourself a new set of tools with this extra money. It will make your life easier.’

The plumber again responded in the negative, saying ‘The tools work perfectly well even though they might be slightly broken or rusted or old. Just like us old people!’ He let out a warm chuckle, which Sam couldn’t help but mirror.

The plumber went on, ‘When you write with a pen, it doesn’t matter if it is a simple pen or an expensive one. If you know how to write, any pen will do. And if you don’t know how to write, no expensive pen in the world will be of any help. The skill lies in the hand, not in the tool.’

The words sank deep. As Sam stared, at the resolute but content face of the plumber, the initial puzzlement and pity were gone, and only admiration was left.

Contemporary times make us race for comfort and wealth. We do what gets us these ‘rewards.’ Everything in excess, nothing being enough. We work long hours for jobs which never really satisfy us. We have bank accounts full of money but we do not feel wealthy or even worthy. We have all the tools- shiny and expensive- yet our outputs always seem to lack that unnameable something. That is probably because we seem to have forgotten the value of the real tools- the tools called:

  • Honesty
  • Hard work
  • Gratitude
  • Contentment

With these intact, even ‘broken tools’ can create miracles and become worthy. Beyond fancy jobs and degrees, it is the work ethic. The work ethic that values honesty and hard work, an attitude that finds gratitude- these ultimately show us what’s worthy. Swanky offices with swankier technology to work with and the swankiest certificates are good but honesty, hard work, gratitude, contentment are the ultimate technology and the ultimate certificates: these are the ‘tools’ that ultimately matter.

The Art of Being Patient and Impatient at the Right Time

There is much merit in knowing when to be patient and when to just ‘go for it’.

Seema and Shriya were having a little debate about whether the ‘slow and steady’ patience wins or whether it is the fast-paced ‘go for it’ approach that helps one get ahead in life.

You know, that classic hare or the tortoise race fable. Seema believed that it was impossible to achieve something where steps had not been taken after careful consideration. She believed success required planning, and planning required you to be patient. Shriya believed that it was impossible to move forward if one kept on patiently waiting and planning and analysing the small details. She believed in planning as little as possible and developing the ability to just ‘wing it’.

Seema believed in patience, and Shriya believed that patience was a waste of time.

Seema believed in trusting the process, Shriya believed in trusting your abilities.

Both approaches had merit, and no wonder everyone else in the office was torn between the two. On some days, you do need to be meticulous, and well-planned, and think about the short-term and long-term implications of the decisions you make. On some days, you just have your gut feeling and you must simply ‘go for it’.

Finally, after much debate, they decided to consult Zeenat, their boss. Zeenat had built the company from a small room, and now, here they were, years later in an office full of employees: COOs, CFOs, VPs, seniors, juniors, from all walks of life. They felt she was the best person to consult, with her experience, wisdom and success to show. Zeenat, their boss. Zeenat, the resident ‘Zen master’ !

As they laid their arguments to her, Zeenat took a pause, rested her palms on the table, and meditated on the two sides for a minute or two, and finally said:

‘You are both right. And you are both wrong’.

Spoken like a true Zen master, no?

Looking at their Seema and Shriya’s puzzled expressions, she continued,

‘You should be patient and impatient both. But being patient and impatient at the wrong time and place will not work. Let me put it this way: you must be patient with results. Results don’t always show up overnight. You must trust the process. You must be patient for the seeds to grow.

‘You must plan ahead, you must work hard and be patient with everything that you do before the seeds of your work show up. If you are impatient, you wouldn’t do one thing properly and will end up going all over the place. You mustn’t be impatient with the results. You see, soil doesn’t yield anything if you don’t let the seeds grow.

‘At the same time, you must be impatient with one thing, and that is effort. If you keep planning without doing anything to execute the plan, you won’t achieve much. If you keep waiting for the ideas to come to you, to trust the timing, without putting in the time into efforts, nothing will happen. You must be relentless and impatient with your efforts. With your execution of ideas. You know what they say- good luck comes to those who work hard. ‘

We need impatience and patience both, at the right time and context. Impatience with efforts. Patience with letting the results show up. This is how the cycle of effort and results harmonizes.

Handling the Post-Festival Blues

With a lull in the long stretch of festivities and having to return to the ‘normal’ work routine, are you also experiencing post-festival blues?

As the long Festive spell from August to October, sees a Break, before we enter into Christmas and New Year Festivities, we have a little Lull.

Lull in the festive energies, lull in the mini- and big- office parties. The Navratri and Diwali decorations are slowly being put aside now, and the office suddenly seems too…normal.

Getting back in the groove after a stretch of festivities can be difficult. There is a lingering feeling of wanting a longer break. If you had no break, you at least wish that the office space would suddenly not go back to being so quiet again. We have cases of the ‘post-festival blues’!

Let us have a look at some ways in which we can use our ‘post-festival blues’ to our advantage:

Enjoy the Routine: Breaks often mean our daily routine goes out of the window- slow mornings, long lunches, no deadlines and evenings spent with no plans for the next day. Going back to routine work after a long stretch of festivities can be tiresome. It may need a lot of motivation….at first.

The beauty of routine is that once you actually get back to it, you discover a lost ‘rhythm’. Sometimes, we actually need things to be structured to have a productive day. That daily commute where you gather your thoughts for the day ahead. Or the positive kind of pressure you put on yourself to meet that deadline. Or the ‘eustress’ or the good kind of stress that propels you to innovate and work hard. All this and all other kind of ‘hard work’ helps us to rediscover the rhythm we may have lost during the festive stretches.

Enjoy the Quiet: The sound of the gentle murmurs, the shuffling of papers, the beeps of machines and the tapping of keyboards- the ‘quiet’ office is often considered one of the best environments to work in. After the din of celebrations, a calm, quiet environment in the office means better focus and better productivity. Now is the best time to use this to the best of our advantage after a refreshing break.

But wait, the festivities are not over yet…

If you are someone who just cannot get over the post-festival blues, well, Christmas is not far away! There are more celebrations, breaks in the routine to look forward to. We can also remember that the ‘diya’ within can always remain lit up- it doesn’t have to end with Diwali. So, light up the office space with your bright presence! We can still wish everyone well even without any festival around. We can bask in the abundance of our life through gratitude. We can keep our work area decorated with small reminders of our loved ones. The gifts of kindness and empathy never go out of season. And there is no wrong time to celebrate hard work.

So, are you ready to turn the festival blues into the joyous lights of the productive routine?

Learning from the Navdurgas

As the festive season sets in, there are ways to enrich ourselves by understanding the Navdurgas.

image for article about learning from navratri

As Navratri sets in, we begin with the festive stretch of the year.

Whether you are here for the devotion, the culture, or just the festivities, there is something for everyone.

Festivals are not just here for our enjoyment, but also our enrichment. They teach us important life-skills, approaches and enable us to live a fulfilling life.

So, without further ado, let us dive into how we can wield the festive spirit to the best of our advantage!

Understanding Differences in Approaches: Navratri has nine forms of the goddess (the ‘devi’), the ‘Navdurgas’ and each form represents not only a quality but an approach to life and the world. Every form is equally valid and no approach, no quality is of less importance. They are ultimately part of the universal shakti, the energy that runs the world according to the mythology.

Shailaputri represents stability, Brahmacharini represents ascetism, Chandraghanta beauty and peace, Kushmanda creation, Skandmata protection and motherhood, Katyayani courage and strength against evil, Kalaratri destruction of fears, Maha Gauri radiance and enlightenment, Siddhidhatri accomplishments and fulfilment.

Different situations require us to channelise the different approaches. Some days we need patience to approach a task. Some days, anger helps to get things done. Some days we need wisdom with our decisions and some days fearlessness. Some days we need to lead and nurture, and on other days, we need to be still.

Thinking about a task with the question of ‘how do I need to approach this particular situation?’ enables us to develop flexibility and context-specific decision-making.

Understanding your Own Strengths: Closely related to understanding how each goddess-form represents an approach to life, is an understanding of each one’s strength.

Each one of has a strength, a characteristic quality that we can wield like no one else.

The goddess-forms too have their own defining characteristics. The grounded nature and stability of Shailaputri is unparalleled. The anger of Kalaratri and the warrior-spirit of Katyayani are literal forces of nature. Maha Gauri’s calm energises us in an altogether different way. Do we try to find the energy of peace when we are looking for the intensity, or vice versa? No, right?

Similarly, each one of us has a strength that almost works as a gift for us. Instead of comparing ourselves to others, why not find out our strengths and channelise them to our advantage? One might be an excellent organiser, while someone else might be an excellent communicator. Another might be an excellent multitasker, while one might excel in deep focused work. Finding our strengths is the key to understanding how we can contribute to our own development as well as development of those around us, whether our loved ones, or the company we work for.

The goddess-forms ultimately are a part of the cosmic ‘shakti’, the energy. They are not really separate from each other- the approach takes the centre-stage based on what the situation requires. Similarly, we have everything within us- calm, strength, anger, agency, wisdom. It is tapping into what works for us the best that enables us to run things. Whether it is running the universe, a company or a team!