Esha was just looking around a bouquet for her husband when she noticed Aliya looking over the other counter. It was the week of Valentine’s Day, and the flower shops were looking picture perfect with a myriad of flowers. Just as bright the shop was looking though, equally dull was Aliya’s demeanour.
Esha guessed the reason- Aliya was single, and this time of the year, many single folks felt that sense of loneliness. As Esha inquired into this, Aliya agreed, and confided, ‘Everyone seems to have someone. I just feel left out. I wish I too had someone to love.’
‘Well, you have yourself, don’t you?’ Esha asked enthusiastically.
Aliya got into thinking mode. Looking at Aliya’s expression, Esha continued,
‘Often when we are single, we focus on the absence of a partner. But we have ourselves, no matter what! Singlehood is an opportunity to nurture the relationship with self…
‘Pursue your passions, build all that for yourself which brings you joy. No other relationship is more accessible and easier to nourish and nurture than the relationship with self. Embrace this relationship, and love might find you. Love often finds us when we are genuinely content and aren’t looking for it.’
With this, Aliya had a big smile on her face. She decided to buy flowers for herself this Valantine’s Day.
Valentine’s Day posts on social media may remind some of us of our loneliness. But we have the choice here to look at it differently. To look at singlehood differently. Self-love is the idea!
Self-love can look like:
- Buying gifts for ourselves, materialistic, like flowers, chocolates or any other thing we like, or something more symbolic, such as making a promise to yourself to begin a good habit.
- Working with a sense of self-love. Your career, your skills, your competence, and the efforts you take to develop them are first and foremost for yourself, and then for others.
- Looking within, and mindfully setting/reevaluating goals for yourself that will help one feel accomplished, and giving one a sense of purpose.
- Explore new hobbies.
- Strengthening personal connections with family and friends.
- Being kind to oneself- accepting all our flaws and humanity unconditionally, and at the same time promise ourselves to be a better person, gently.
- Being your authentic self- celebrating your small quirks and eccentricities that harm no one and make you, you.
Love comes in all forms. Sometimes it comes to us when we are least expecting. While some of us are yet to have that special someone walk into our lives, we can love ourselves first in all our authenticity, walking to the rhythm of growth, connection and purpose. Before we look for love outside of ourselves, we must also nurture the love that we direct towards ourselves.