Tag: growth mindset

Easing into the Growth Mindset

Growth mindset enables us to make criticisms and feedback into sources of improvement, growth and learning.

As Sudeshna started her new job, the initial excitement started to fade.

Contrary to her expectations, she seemed to be receiving more feedback than she had anticipated.

Sure, any new endeavour means a new learning curve. But somehow, Sudeshna started to feel that everyone seemed to be saying nothing but criticising her.

Everywhere she turned, she got feedback feedback and more feedback, about what she can do better, what she can do differently.

Over time, the self-created monster of self-doubt started to creep in, and she began to wonder if she is even capable of her job and if she is even competent enough. She began to wonder if she can ever do anything right.

With a defeated expression, one fine evening at a work party, Sudeshna was standing in a corner quietly. One of her new colleagues, a senior HR manager Rachna noticed her gloomy demeanour and approached her.

‘Hi Sudeshna, may I join you? You seem very gloomy. Is everything okay?’

‘Hi Rachna. Yes, everything is fine, but I don’t know if I am in the right job…’

Somehow, Sudeshna found Rachna’s presence to be comforting, and she confided all the self-doubt, the impostor syndrome and the feelings of inadequacy she had been experiencing. To this Rachna responded,

‘I understand. New jobs can be tough to adapt to, plus so much feedback can make one feel like there’s nothing right that they are doing. I see it- you should have been given some encouragement and positive feedback as well. It is also true though, that receiving feedback is but another opportunity for growth. Have you heard about growth mindset?

Sudeshna nodded with some doubt. She had heard about it, but didn’t know about it in detail. Rachna continued her explanation,

‘Growth mindset is when you adopt a particular attitude. It is believing that your intelligence, aptitude and competence are forever works in progress, and every criticism, every feedback especially negative feedback is an opportunity to develop your intelligence, aptitude, capability and competence further.

‘Instead seeing criticisms and feedback as attacks on your capability and competence, they should be seen as instruments to grow them further. The feedback will only help you in succeeding in your role and doing a fabulous job with it eventually. That’s growth mindset.’

Sudeshna found her mood lighten and lift, as she realised how wonderful it was to receive so many opportunities to grow at her new job.

Growth mindset is thus all about:

  • Changing the way you view feedback: the feedback you are getting isn’t about pointing out your flaws—it’s about helping you improve and succeed in your role.
  • Feedback as a chance to learn and not something to be upset about.
  • Believing that your competence and capabilities are not static and fixed, and every feedback, every criticism is an opportunity to grow and evolve your competence and capabilities.
  • Understanding that most of the times when people criticise you, they are not trying to bring you down deliberately and it is actually a reflection of their belief in you that you are capable of doing better.

Doing everything right all the time is a myth. Instead of trying to put the pressure on ourselves to be perfect all the time, and in turn closing ourselves off to feedback or seeing feedback as an attack on our capabilities, growth mindset enables us to ease up a bit, allowing ourselves to learn and grow.

Qualities that Make you the “Real Winner” in Life

Awards and certificates have their place. But ultimately it is the process, the attitude, the willingness to learn and grow that determine what you ‘win’.

A wonderful art exhibition was going on, and Sudeshna was on cloud nine. After all, her painting had been put on display and hundreds of people had visited the art gallery so far. There were other paintings by other artists getting displayed as well.

Surabhi, a friend of Sudeshna was one of the visitors. They both greeted each other, but Sudeshna noticed that Surabhi had a somewhat troubled expression on her face. ‘Is everything all right, Surabhi?’

‘Sudeshna, I was walking up here, and outside I saw a list of names. They had all won various prizes for their pieces. Some even really big rewards. Your name was not there. I think you deserved a prize for this.’

‘Oh! Of course, that list! I know what you are talking about. I know some people on the list; some of my good friends and really talented people. I am happy for them.’

Surabhi was touched by Sudeshna’s ability to be happy for others but she was also a bit angry now. She asked, ‘But Sudeshna, don’t you feel even a little sad about not making the list?’ Surabhi wanted to ask her if it didn’t feel like a waste of effort that she didn’t win anything, but held back since she didn’t want to sound too harsh. But her expression, even if held only for a second before she put up a smile, was read by Sudeshna.

‘Oh, you think the painting here has been put up, but to no avail? That it’s all a wasted effort if there has been no prize? Childish consolation prize kind of thing?’

Surabhi couldn’t say anything but Sudeshna knew she had read Surabhi’s mind.

Sudeshna explained ‘See, I get your empathy, and I am grateful to have a friend who wants me to excel to the best of my abilities. But my primary goal in putting effort in this painting was to become the person that painting something like this would compel me to be. I feel like a changed person, and I think that’s a big enough win for me. For now.’

Surabhi looked a bit puzzled, so Sudeshna continued, ‘There are lots of people in the list who won by sheer good luck, no denying that. Some are genuinely talented. I wish them all well. I also wish that the winners have got a boost to keep developing their skills and upgrading their goals. I hope they don’t simply rest on their laurels. I see that a lot of the winners seem to have remained the same persons.

‘Their attitude before and after finishing their paintings remains the same. I on the other hand feel like a different person- I understood my capacity to work hard, I know what needs to be improved, I feel grateful and at peace that even when I didn’t technically ‘win’ I have so many people visiting me and congratulating, complimenting on my painting. Not having a name on the list is one minor negative to an otherwise very positive result.’

Surabhi was left an awe of Sudeshna’s attitude. Just then a major artist of the city, who Sudeshna had invited specially for the event, walked over to Sudeshna’s painting and started what looked like a fruitful discussion. This was a ‘win’.

What lessons do we have from Sudeshna’s ‘win’?

Attitude matters:

There is always a silver lining in everything. The bigger goal, the larger perspective is what matters. Winning prizes, awards and certificates is a good thing. But the larger goal should be to cultivate that attitude, that set of traits, skills, competence and enjoyment in the process that help you grow and move forward. Prizes, awards, and certificates will work short-term, but in the long run it’s the process of it all, the attitude and willingness to grow and adapt that matter.

Meaningful networking:

It takes only one influential person to notice your work and capability for your life to change. Endless networking with hundreds of people and hoping something fruitful to come out of it is leaving things to chance. But networking mindfully and meaningfully is taking control in your own hands. Both approaches have their place, and it is up to us which one we wish to take.

And finally, show up and start, the rest will fall into place. Sudeshna didn’t win the prize, and her name was not on the list of winners. However, she was still expected to be at the exhibition. She could have sulked and skipped it all, wondering what’s the point if she didn’t ‘win’. But she anyway decided to show up, be cheerful about it, and stand by her own sense of achievement. That confidence, that sense of self-assuredness, the sense that one knows where one stands, and one is willing to grow and learn shows. It all shows in one’s conduct and attitude. And that’s a big win.